Travel Log 1

Packing, for a nerd’s vacation

 

Welcome my friends, thanks to the success of the Valentine’s day article and my upcoming cruise vacation I’ve been asked to do a nerd’s travel log.

 

Considering Gomer and  I haven’t left yet it seems fitting that the first post be about the preparation every nerd should take before embarking on an outing such as this. To note is that I am not going to any convention. This isn’t a nerds vacation like “I’m going to New Zealand to see the Hobbit Holes” it’s “I am a nerd and have to survive amongst normal people without a game console”. This is what you do if you are the only nerd around.

 

Know your venue.

A little research goes a long way. I am fully aware of the amenities available on the ship and at port. I know exactly how many gaming consoles will be available to me, the game selection, comic book, and hobby shops near the Miami hotel and out at sea (very few of all). As such I can plan exactly what I’ll need on this trip.

 

Know your limits.

So now we know what is lacking and what we have aplenty. Next step is to take everything you want to take and look critically at what is actually feasible to take. I cannot take my Necron army and terrain with me, in large part because it is hard to play a table top war game on a rocking ship. Similarly, any consoles are out of the question. I really want to take part in the next Mass Effect 3 online event but I will just have to get over my inability to. It hurts but sacrifices must be made sometimes. That being said, I don’t have to cut myself off entirely. I’ve got my tablet and a few novels to keep me company and plan to spend an entirely unhealthy amount of time in a hammock reading comics and drinking mango juice. Perhaps even pack up a small squad of troops to paint.

 

Remember that you are vacationing.

Believe it or not this is an easy thing to forget. I was thinking of getting in a few levels of Angry Birds in Space and was about to download it off the Android marketplace before Gomer slammed himself into the back of my knee nearly sending me down the stairs. I saw his point almost immediately. Any casual or online games that you normally partake in should be left behind. You are on vacation and should be relaxing and re-charging. Too many times do people find themselves frustrated and stressed out while playing Words with Friends. Here’s a good rule of thumb. If you have ever played this game and become either angry or found yourself sweating slightly, don’t bring it. I am far too competitive an individual and so this rule tears away almost all gaming for me on this trip. Instead, I’m bringing reading material. Ten novels and twenty three comic issues will be accompanying me onto the floating den of hedonism that I’ll be calling home for the next few days.

 

Attire.

I’m going to the equator, I should wear a t-shirt. Make sure to do a major load of laundry so that you have all the necessary DC, Marvel, TV and movie shirts you’ll need on this trip. Unfortunately I didn’t think of this soon enough and now must supplement my wardrobe with coloured power rings.

 

Other Nerds

You are going to meet them. We have become popular and so more people are openly nerdy. I understand the need to assert your dominance by proving yourself to be the greatest Star Wars nerd on the ship (You aren’t, I am you miserable di’kut) but you should probably ease up on other subject areas. I know an inordinate amount of Star Wars, Warhammer 40k, Star Trek, Forgotten Realms.....okay let’s just shorten it to a LOT of nerdy stuff not even counting the comics I review. This doesn’t give me free reign to bludgeon any other nerds I run across with my mental knowledge bat. I’ll rule Star Wars, Warhammer 40k and comic books. Let the other nerds have their subjects and their time in the spotlight. You are on vacation but so are they so be considerate.

 

Unless they talk about Twilight. I’m throwing them into the ocean if they ask whose “team” I’m on. I’m on the Little Mermaid’s team.

 

The Talk

You have to have “the talk” with whomever you are going with if they aren’t nerds. My definition of relaxation is very different from the definition that the rest of my family hold to. My mom wanted me to sign up for some island excursions where you learn the history of the islands and the various forts built on them. I have no interest in the achievements of slavery, I already own an Ipod. My definition of relaxation is reading something enjoyable, something that isn’t on my list because people want to see it reviewed. I fully intend to spend the whole of this vacation reading, either in a hammock on the ship or lying on the beach with my feet in a cool pool of water. If I didn’t say anything to my parents or brother they would be on me constantly to do things that I don’t find relaxing. Now, obviously some concessions need to be made, but by and large I’ll be left alone simply because I informed them of my intentions ahead of time. You all should do the same.

 

Well, that’s it for the preliminary work. My next log entry should see me out on the ocean. Hopefully Gomer doesn’t get sea sick easily.